Wedding Bells

I met Carly years ago, when she and my son, Will, played soccer as 7- and 9-year-olds.

The next season, her mother, Mary, convinced me to help coach their soccer team and I’ve enjoyed being Mary’s lieutenant ever since.

We cooked for the kids at Wednesday night church school until our kids outgrew it.

Carly wanted to ride horses so we went for Sunday rides until I turned those rides into jobs to do, then I hired Carly for other ranch work, too.

Carly is intentional.

She aims her arrow for a specific target and shoots straight.

In Costa Rica, she wanted to zipline above the jungle so the rest of us went along.

In college, she knew exactly what she wanted to do for a career so she found the right program and moved to New York.

Mary and Carly helped me work my sheep until Carly got smart and left for college. Mary and I have yet to get that smart, but we keep trying.

I met Michael while working sheep years ago, too.

Both of us, along with his brother and his dad, helped our mutual friend as the alley crew for shearing.

As I remember it, the day was cold. We worked quickly enough to work up a sweat and then stood around long enough to freeze. Michael worked deliberately and diligently to do a good job, but it didn’t take long for him to get smart enough to be busy on shearing day.

Michael and Carly started dating nine years ago, while both were in high school.

As older, wiser cynics who can point to many failed high school romances, we watched them surprise us over and over with their commitment to one another.

Neither of them bothered to point out high school romance success stories. They just went about building their lives, deliberately and intentionally.

After all, actions speak louder than words.

So when Carly and Michael asked me to officiate their wedding, I was honored.

And scared.

I wanted to get this one right.

Fortunately, my license came with a booklet of tips.

I read it twice.

I practiced my message as I drove to Nine Mile, the beautiful venue set in the midst of Ponderosa pines with whitetail deer grazing in a nearby meadow.

Neither Michael’s nor Carly’s family is particularly emotionally effusive, but everyone involved in the wedding was buzzing with activity as we worked to decorate the schoolhouse and pavilion.

Once again, actions spoke louder than words.

Their love shined through with flower arrangements, food and thoughtful solutions to unexpected problems.

Despite diverse and strong personalities, nobody argued. We all did what Carly and Michael wanted us to do. If they weren’t available, Mary directed.

At 4:26 on the day before the wedding, I realized that I was supposed to lead the rehearsal at 4:30.

I guessed I missed that detail in the helpful tips section of my license.

By then, Carly and Michael had outlined the aspects they cared about most so I had a good idea of how to direct everyone involved.

The next day, I was privileged to look into their eyes and know that Michael and Carly knew exactly what they were promising, and they were confident in their lifetime partnership.

Michael and Carly both find peace and fulfillment in nature, so I connected the characteristics of nature with characteristics of a strong marriage.

I mentioned microbes but left out talking about my worms. I waited until the reception to mention sheep.

The newlyweds turned down my offer of a small flock as their wedding gift.

They are smarter than I realized.